Fred Phelps: Hero For A Day

Today, free speech won another round in the Supreme Court of the United States. In this instance, it's rather hard to feel too joyous when the winner of the case is the despicable hate-monger Fred Phelps and his clan of crazies from the Westboro Baptist Church.

Sometimes in life, the victory is simply more important than the victor.

On the surface, it would seem like a no-brainer that Fred Phelps’ homophobic, anti-military protests outside of funerals should have been stopped by the High Court today. Americans understandably and overwhelmingly object to the actions of these deplorable troublemakers -- myself included.

That being said, free speech does not and should not discriminate between who it protects and who it doesn’t. Unfortunately, that even includes the Westboro Baptist Church.


Even if a majority of people disagree with the cretins who perform these ‘protests’, the minority voice in this country must be protected too. That freedom is what makes us America. That’s what makes us great.

People in our country have the right to wave a flag or burn it. They have the right to support the government or admonish it. They have the right to march for more rights or against the rights of others. The bottom line is that people deserve to have a voice even when it isn't deserving of my/yours/our respect.


We cannot pick and choose between who deserves free speech. What sounds disagreeable to you probably sounds agreeable to someone else – even if it’s only to a handful of ears. Sometimes pointy Vulcan ears.


Yes, our country would be a better place without Fred Phelps and his band of kooks, but for once (and probably only once), he was on the right side of an issue even if he is wrong about everything else.

The Blood Thirsty, Pro-Life Minister

I'm always amazed by the hypocrisy of pro-lifers. They'll lose their minds over the idea that people are doing away with a day old fetuses via morning after pills, but it's A-OK to strap someone to a chair and have them jolted by 1.21 gigawatts until they are charbroiled sirloin.


The quote that inspired this post came from the saintly Mick Huckabee who says of the original WikiLeaks source:

"Whoever in our government leaked that information
is guilty of treason, and I think anything less
than execution is too kind a penalty."

Nice. You gotta love a blood-thirsty minister.

What I'll never quite understand is why ALL life is not sacred to pro-lifers. If you are going to go around touting how "pro life" you are, shouldn't you actually be PRO-life -- as in support of ALL human lives -- and not just the cute, white, soon-to-be natural born citizen fetuses? Apparently it's also OK to bomb the shit out of a country who didn't even attack us and kill thousands of innocent people in the process, but putting the kibosh on a small cluster of cells is the worst sin imaginable.

Honestly, what ever happened to the idea of Thou Shalt Not Kill? Most of the pro-life enthusiasts are religious kooks yet it's like they think this rule is subjective. Was there an asterisk somewhere on the 'ol stone tablet to inform us that this commandment was up for interpretation? Sure the commandment is literally etched in stone and we accept it as fact, but...


While I'm not sure how comfortable I am with every detail that has been uncovered in this WikiLeaks ordeal, the one thing that I am sure of is that the guy who spills the beans on the government isn't deserving of being executed -- or whatever unspeakable, masochistic plans Huckabee has imagined for him.

WWJD? Not What 62% of Christians Would Do

Today a PEW Research poll was released showing that 62% of evangelical Protestants support torture sometimes or often.

So wait -- does that mean that these people also agree with the torturing of this guy??

That cross isn't just some iconic trinket; it's the thing Jesus was tortured on! Maybe I'm just ill-informed about where the Bible condones torturing people. It just seems to me that a guy who was brutally tortured would likely not support such actions -- especially someone who preached about turning the other cheek:

You have heard that it was said,
'An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth.'
But I tell you, do not resist an evil person.
If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also.

—Matthew 5:38-39, NIV

Instead, the right-wing evangelicals prefer the writings from the gospel of Stone Cold:

I just whooped your ass!
—Austin 3:16, WWE

Oh, but I suppose the stuff that Jesus was spouting off about was way back before planes were flown into skyscrapers and the like. True. But if the Bible has grown outdated in instances like this, then why isn't it outdated when it comes to not letting women become priests, opposing condoms, opposing gays and opposing women who have taken semi-nude pictures to enter beauty pageants? Oh wait... apparently the last example is OK now.

Point being, evangelicals -- at least 62% of them -- are clearly putting their politics before religion. It's mind-boggling how those who would condemn what happened to Jesus would support similar actions today so as long as it's their side doing the torturing.

Mmmm... Christian Values

So I'm watching this tool from the Family Research Council on MSNBC as I type this and this guy said that Carrie Prejean was basically cruicified for her Christian values.

Christian values, eh?

Boy, Christian values sure turn me on. If this is what counts as 'Christian values', I might have to sign back up again.

You'll notice that almost every person who defends this women almost all agree with her homophobic beliefs. They also manage to ignore the fact that she lied multiple times about her pictures and that her 'Christian values' are pretty fucking selective. For example...

I may not agree with her 'fuck the gays' stance, but the reason(s) why she shouldn't be Miss California has nothing to do with her position on same-sex marriage. It's that she's a total liar, a hypocrite for citing her Christian beliefs for her stance, being a spokesperson for a hate group while she is the reigning Miss California and, most importantly, that her naked & semi-naked pictures are a clear violation of the pageant (and Christian) rules.

This whole thing ticks me off because she gets rewarded for breaking the written rules and lying solely because she's good for business. Let's face it -- that's all the guy with the funny hair really cares about. Does anyone even know who the name of the actual Miss USA?

Ok, I think I've ranted more than enough about this skank, so here's one more very Christian photo of her for the road...

More Christian Craziness

So there's this poor kid in Ohio who attends a fundamentalist Baptist school who faces expulsion if he attends his girlfriend's prom. His nutty school forbids dancing, rock music, hand-holding and kissing. Talk about no fun...

The big question is what this has to do with HER prom? Good question. His school says that their shitty rules still apply. I call shenanigans.

The deal is that they're going to suspend him if he attends her prom -- which, in result, will totally mess up his graduation -- and they'll expel him if he gets drunk or porks her. So what are they gonna do -- spy on him??

First off, we all know that kids don't do anything like that at proms. They're too young to do such things..

Secondly, I'm sure the students are her school are well-behaved young people. That particular school's most famous graduate is Pittsburgh Steelers QB, Ben Roethlisberger and seeing how he turned out, I'm sure there is nothing to worry about...

Seriously though, I feel bad for this kid. His wacky school's rules shouldn't apply beyond the school's grounds.

The principle of Crazy University claims, "In life, we constantly make decisions whether we are going to please self or please God." Obviously, he is implying that going to prom does not please God. Where the hell in the Bible does it say that?? Is God really that much of a hard-ass?

The kid says he's still going to the prom and I sure hope that he does. This school and its principle do not speak for God -- they just think they do. If God is this anti-fun, then what good is He?